The past week was a crazy week. Crazier than many that I've had in the past couple months. Mostly self-inflicted, so I shouldn't be bitching. But as a good friend once told me- what use is the blog if you can't bitch on it? So bitch I will, and merrily so. :-)
I can't do one night stands anymore. Until recently, I could pull them off which such grace, such flair. I remember all those long nights spent- sometimes on a whim, sometimes being pressured into them- but enjoyable, nevertheless. If it did get tiring, I'd always remind myself that it was just one night, and most of the times, it was all I had. That alone was enough to fuel me. There was some kind of joy in being up all night- the background music alternating between smooth jazz /instrumental and then some up-tempo stuff. Before I knew it, I'd be looking out of the window and watching the sky change, the sun rise. Then getting out in the cool morning with a heady feeling of accomplishment and taking the first bus home, when everyone else on it was heading to work. A refreshing shower, a hearty, caffeine laced breakfast, and I was ready to get back to work myself, all charged up. I functioned fine in the day, as long as some more caffeine and lots of water were consumed. Later in the evening, some attempts at keeping myself afloat in the swimming pool ensured that I only went to sleep at normal bed-time. And ta-da! my sleep-wake cycles were hardly affected.
Not anymore. My last few attempts at spending all night in the lab, with my first, second and third loves, have not fared too well. One time I managed to spook myself out with random weird noises I was hearing in the lab. At first I thought I had achieved the impossible by making the E.coli talk back to me; but soon realised it was the new building we had just moved into. Driving myself home in the wee hours of the morning was not fun. The following day saw me grumpy, incoherent and barely able to think clearly. No amount of coffee helped and going swimming at this point was a life-endangering risk. My sleep-wake cycles were completely out of whack and if you knew me, you wouldn't want to talk to me around then. It's too bad I cannot pull these off any more. OK, before any of you smart asses tries to say it, I'll put it out there, it looks like I'm getting old. Le sigh..:)
Rant #2: I hate it when people can't take for no for an answer. Why is it so hard to understand? I do not want you to come here, I do not want to see you. I don't care if I'm on your way to wherever. And I cannot spell it out any better without offending you. But I am not going to give in to being nice at the cost of my already dwindling sanity and much loved peace of mind. Sorry. GO AWAY. /rant#2
Such it is, this sad life o' mine. But there is exciting stuff too- am off to Canada next week for the same reason hundreds of sixth-year Ph.D students make their way there..to renew my student visa. As if it wasn't enough, having to explain to all and sundry why I am still in grad school after five years, now I have to explain myself at the consulate general of the united states of america. blaargh. As is always the case before I travel, I try to accomplish the world before leaving and I know the craziness will continue until I get into my car and drive to the airport. Traveling always excites me. In the little time I steal from work, I'm researching what to do, where to go, where to stay while in Canada. Until my wise friend warns me, "it's all of 4 days, tgfi, do not over-plan." Some of my best trips were the ones I made impromptu, no planning, just pick up and go. And I've faced some of my worst disappointments from build-ups generated by elaborate planning. But I guess with all this information so easily available, it's too tempting to want to find out the exact street my hostel is on and the number of miles from there to the museum. Sheesh. But how I love doing it! :-) Hopefully, I will have a more interesting post when I'm back. For now, the brain is fried and refuses to listen.