When I was trying to get a DSL connection set up at home, I spent a total of at least 3 to 4 hours chasing the verizon buggers and their stupid voice-recognition software that would always answer the phone. After a frustrated hour of trying to get someone to help me about my online order, and never encountering the right menu option from the list that was pre-recorded, I got online and chatted with one of their reps, who suggested that I follow the option "billing" when i called in again, instead of "new orders". One of the confounding issues was that I did not have a verizon wireless phone number to identify myself. My last conversation with verizon went like this:
VW (irritating nasal twangy bot voice) : Welcome to verizon. you've reached verizon internet services. starting with your area code please say or enter your ten digit phone number now. or say, "i don't know it"
Me (calm and composed voice- i've done this before) : I don't know it
VW: Which are you calling about? "tech support, billing, or sales?"
Me: (still calm) Billing.
VW: In order to better assist you,I need to know the exact nature of your problem. Which of the following do you need assistance with..blah blah blah. Or say other. You can also go back to our main menu...blah blah blah
Me: (even before she finishes, loud voice) Other
VW: I'm sorry, I did not hear you. Which of these options did you select. *Rattles all the bleddy 34 options again.
Me: (waiting patiently till the end, and then screaming) OTHER
VW: I'm trying to get to know the exact problem so I can direct you to the relevant associate. Our support staff is trained to handle different issues...blah blah.. so , if you're calling to find out your balance, say balance. If you'd like to ...blah blah blah blah blah blah or say continue
Me: (calm voice) Continue
VW: I'm sorry, I did not understand you. If you need to know your current balance, please say balance. If you're calling about blah blah blah blah blah Otherwise, say continue.
Me: (calm voice, gritting teeth, using all my will power to not fling the phone at the window) CONTINUE
VW: I'm sorry, I still did not understand. Did you need help with your current balance? If so, please say balance. If you....blah blah blah blah blah Otherwise, say continue.
Me: (very calm voice) How about F**K YOU?
VW: You said continue. Please hold on while I transfer your call to the right agent.