So you play the avoid game for a while, it works. Then you play hide and seek. Then you play silly excuses game. More excuses materialize that even look authentic (you're getting better at it). God knows you have your reasons. Then you play the i-can-fool-myself-and-others game. You get really good at it. Then you are in a hazy zone because even you don't know any more what it is that you want. All you can sense is resistance, the same old comfort in comfort-zone syndrome. You easily convince yourself to see what you want to see. It's the oldest trick in the book. More deception, more inertia. Nothing inspires you to zap out of it. Life goes on.
Then something happens, enough to make you stop and consider. Wonder where you're going with all of this. Whether you're being fair to yourself, and to others involved. But most of all whether you're being true to yourself. You sit yourself down. Have a real serious one-to-one with yourself. You still don't know what it is that you want. But that's okay. Nobody ever has all the answers. It's important to be true to yourself though. You can keep running, you can find more places to hide. Nothing comes easy. Nothing comes risk-free. There are no guarantees..except that life will go on.