Friday, August 13, 2010

W O M M

"It is what it is".

Whoever came up with that most redundant, annoying phrase that grates my ears every time I hear it.....Of course it is what it is. Otherwise, it wouldn't be, right?

The point is, what it is, is, either wrong or bothersome in some way, and that is why it is being brought up. I.I.W.I.I. is NOT a response. It is a useless bunch of words strung together and spouted.

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The summer of 2010- is slipping by me- and it just dawned on me that this is my last summer in the U.S. My list of cities to visit stays untouched- after Chicago I never went back to it. Where do I find the time, and money, to travel both within the US and to India?

Sometimes, I have grand, over-reaching to-do lists for the day, and by mid day, I am striking off items or pushing them to the next day because I know I won't get to them...and end up with doing the bare minimum. Thats how I feel about my cities to visit/ things to do before I leave the US list. In between working on my post-doc, sustaining the long distance relationship, and making the most of my proximity to my niece, there's very little time/resources for other stuff. So if I have to revise that list, as far as places to visit go, the bare minimum would have to be the Grand Canyon, and California. That's it. I really want to pull these off and call it a day- or ten years.

Then I have a smaller easier local list- which includes going to a Broadway show, going for a boat ride in the river, and exploring a couple museums. That, I should be able to do.

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These days I am feeling positive about work. Nothing is near done, but I feel like I am making a difference. And it may be worth it, after all. Hope this feeling stays. But things are still slow. I have been time and again been accused of being a perfectionist at work with my experiments. Unnecessarily sweating the small stuff. But how can you not? This is science- and every big conclusion we are going to make from these experiments is supposed to be meaningful in the bigger picture- and not just in the limited confines of convenient sampling, yes? Especially when you talk about cancer research. So I can't help but sweat the small stuff. I do not want my work to add the amount of junk thats already out there, along with all its caveats and disclaimers. What is the point in that?

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Its close to 3 AM and I cannot sleep. And I have to be in the lab early morning. :(

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I don't get why some people lie through their teeth. Even if just white lies - I refuse to believe that they are naive enough to think that their lies are being believed- which makes me think they really don't care. Its selfish and inconsiderate. Why don't you have the balls to be honest?

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I had a wonderful weekend. Friends, company and warmth. I dreaded coming home to an empty apartment on Sunday evening, and couldn't wait for the work-week to begin.

2 comments:

silcador said...

When someone says IIWII, there is an unsaid "deal with it" that follows it.

To paraphrase the same thing in one word - 'Acceptance' (need not be passive).

La vida Loca said...

don't get why some people lie through their teeth. Even if just white lies - I refuse to believe that they are naive enough to think that their lies are being believed- which makes me think they really don't care. Its selfish and inconsiderate. Why don't you have the balls to be honest?...
so true that! same happens to me too. grrrrrr