Sunday, November 14, 2010

W O M M

The truth is, I am trying to avoid working as I write this post.

My neighbours- and the only friends I have around here moved out yesterday. We got along really well and I will really miss having them right next door, making impromptu visits and stuff. I also feel really bad that I wasn't too helpful to them during their move. I put in a few hours of taping boxes, lugging them, etc. but that was it. Partly because I am so unfit, I cannot do the heavy lifting work for too long, my knees and back just revolt. Also I had to work in the lab to make a deadline. We do what we have to do, right? But I can't help feeling a bit bad. Especially because I've enjoyed so much help each time I had to move. I remember the time I was leaving lutom, I didn't call my friends to help me because I was such a mess and wanted to sort it all out on my own before calling people to help. Finally, there was no choice. And all sense of shame/embarrassment left me as my friend M was scrubbing my fridge and cooking range while I kept tearing up junk mail and there were 2 hours left for me to hand over my apartment and get out of there. If not for her just coming in and taking charge, I think i'd have missed my flight.

Then I remember the time I was vacating my Philly apartment. I was dealing with an entirely different kind of mess: I was struggling to finish a paper and was under tremendous pressure to get it done before I moved out of Philly, since I was headed to India right away. So while I sat at my computer and worked, B, who I had been dating for a few months then, was sitting and emptying out my apartment into boxes and taping them and labeling them, and, in what I still consider an amazing feat, did not say a word about how much junk I had. :) That was the point I decided I need to marry this guy. :) :)

I think when it comes to packing up your stuff and moving, we all need the "Take charge" type of friends. People who will pick up and do stuff, and not come and ask you every little thing, while your own mind is filled with dozens of bouncing thoughts. I tried to be that friend for my neighbours yesterday, but wish I could've done more of it.

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As I watch the way couples interact, I imagine how life will be when B and I finally start living together as husband and wife, almost a whole year after we got married. Right now it feels almost strange to say husband / wife in a marriage that has been solely long distance. I foresee a considerable amount of bickering once we get together because we have both been living on our own for so long now, and are quite set in our ways. I am actually looking forward to both, the living together and the ensuing bickering :).

And in spite of all the problems that come with R2I, I do feel that this might be the best time to leave the US - Job cuts, research funding cuts, and the instability that lies ahead. India has its own share, though, so that will be another struggle.

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OK time to get back to work. Over and out.

6 comments:

La vida loca said...

oh totally get you. especially the long distance and then living together thing. Been there, done that. It's not bad at all. Especially if one person is easy going. *cough* me *cough* :) It'll be alright.

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

LOL

nitish said...

You might get more friends if people actually knew where & who you were.

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

what- you don't know yet? everybody knows now!

Kits said...

Patience bears sweet fruits and all that jazz. I could not wait for 4 months to pass so I could be with the now-husband. Keep at it and time will just fly by gurl.

SF-1 said...

I have been lucky enough in the sense that when I moved out of my apartment previously, I was not the last one to move out. So I was only packing my 2 bags with my own stuff and not the general home stuff. So the rule number 1 at such times - Never be the last one to vacate or else, be ready to pay the amount.